Success requires support.
Recently I was talking with my wife about this web site; asking her thoughts about it. She told me that she thought the articles were good, but she didn’t see anywhere on the site where I mentioned her. Why wasn’t she one of my passions?
I have to admit I was taken aback - how could my wife think she wasn’t one of my passions? Of course she is - she’s supported me through every half-baked, half-cocked or hair-brained scheme I’ve undertaken since we’ve been together. I thought she should just know she’s one of my passions.
But when I started to reflect on it a little more, and really reviewed my site with an eye towards her feelings, I realized that I haven’t really said anything about her or my passion and love for her.
Even thought I thought it was a given, I hadn’t said it. I wasn’t providing enough support myself to the people that let me be successful. Without her support, encouragement and help I wouldn’t be half as successful as I am today. When I think I can’t achieve something, or I’m not as good as I want to be, she’s there, supporting me, encouraging me and making sure she sets me straight when I get too negative.
How often have you done this - taken the people who are your support system for granted? It’s easy to do, and once you start letting these relationships erode, you’re doomed to wander down the path to failure! So how do you keep the relationships in your success support system in tip-top shape?
Not taking a person for granted sounds easy in theory; making sure you never do it in practice is a little more difficult. As people live and work and share close relationships it’s easy to slip into a routine where the status quo and the rigors of daily life keep us focused more on our own needs and wants than on those of others around us.
How you keep focused on them and not yourself isn’t difficult; there isn’t any magic formula or 5-step “secret program.” In the words of a famous advertising campaign; you “just do it.”
Every day do the following for the people that support your success:
- Encourage them
- Challenge them
- Excite them
- Congratulate them
- Help them
- Praise them
- Love them
- Teach them
- Learn from them
- Support them
The easy part is the “doing.” The hard part is keeping your passion for them forefront every day!
I’ll admit for myself that it’s a struggle sometimes. At the end of a long week I have been known to think of myself first and my wife second. I’m ready to relax and unwind and be left alone. But it’s my wife’s support, encouragement and help that gets me through the week in the first place!
Like everything else you can make a habit out of keeping yourself aware of your need to support those that support you. After our conversation I took a small card and wrote, “I keep my wife first in my mind; I support, excite, challenge, help, love, teach, learn from and encourage her every day!”
I keep this card in my wallet and I look at it each morning when I put my wallet in my pants and each night when I take my wallet out of my pants. It’s a constant reminder to not take her for granted, and with time the behaviors will become a habit.
How many people in your life would benefit if you created a card (and habit) like this for yourself?
2 comments January 15th, 2006
